Metric and Yam Fries

Having parents away for the evening is such a strong reminder of why moving out is important to me. Make what I feel like eating, listen to whatever I want to hear – those things today being crispy, crunchy yam fries and an album by Metric. Having never listened to Metric and rarely eating yam fries, this evening is pretty awesome.

The only issue is when my parents aren’t home thinking up things to eat for me, the hunger pangs start to sting and I realise with a vague sense of panic I have no idea what to eat. Luckily there were yams today. But what am I going to do when I am living on my own, with no parents to think up good ideas?

I’m planning on writing a recipe book for myself, so I can peruse piles of recipes that I personally love, but I’ve got other projects to tackle for now. So I guess I’ll just have to file it away here!

Yam Fries! 😀 (Serving size: a big handful, good as an accompaniment)

Half a yam
1 tbsp olive oil
Lemon pepper and salt to taste

1. Preheat oven to 400-425F
2. Peel and cut up the yam super thinly – think McDonald’s chip size!
3.  Pour oil into a wide bowl (soup bowl?), sprinkle with plenty of lemon pepper and salt. Add the fries and coat with the oil mix.
4. Bake for about 15-20 minutes (depending on size/desired crispiness). Check partway through; flipping them will even the crispiness, but they’re also really good if you don’t flip ’em – then there’s one soft, and one crunchy side 🙂

These would be delicious with a salad with lettuce/baby spinach/rocket leaves, halved boiled eggs, cucumber, grated carrot, and some kind of light but creamy sauce with a bit of kick – maybe a light cesar?

?

I haven’t posted in ages. I’m not really sure why. The best way for me to get my thoughts straightened out – to think at all – is to think as if I am speaking to someone. This usually ends up with me blathering on and on (and on) to my poor friends. (Sorry, guys!) Which is why a blog seems totally logical – I can write as if I am speaking to someone, without people trying to stab their eyes out with the nearest semi-sharp object.

I think maybe I just didn’t feel like writing things down. The last couple months have been interesting at best, and some days it honestly just felt like pulling through the night sapped up all my strength. And sometimes things are just too much to put into words. Sometimes what you feel is so base that you can’t describe it at all. Heaven knows I felt like that a lot.

But hey. It’s like the opening to my new favourite album, What Seperates Me From You:

I am fueled by all forms of failure
I paid the price
So I’ll take what’s mine!

Something about those lines just hits me everytime.

I feel like I’ve got so many opportunities at my fingertips. I just need to get my act together and figure which one to go for first.

I just realised the greatest thing. After Sam and I broke up, I spent so much of my time being so sad. I’d cycle through up-times and down-times, and I could practically count how long each lasted. At first I’d rarely be ‘up’ for more than half an hour at a time – then it would all hit me again and I’d be back to tears. Once I cried myself out, I’d either sleep, mope, or just feel so brilliantly optimistic for a while again. It’s been a painfully slow process, but as the weeks have gone by, I’ve just feel up more and more. I no longer recognise that I feel ‘up’ again, and realise sadly that soon enough, I’ll be back to feeling ‘down’ again. I spent an awful amount of time being angry. Feeling so betrayed and bitter that I felt on many occasions like storming up to his house and giving him a piece of my mind. I still feel like that a bit, but, more and more, it matters less and less. I go through days maybe only thinking of it just a few times.

These days most of my thoughts are that of adventure. I nearly went to Thailand in January. Sadly, I don’t have the cash, or I’d definitely have booked a flight. I’m definitely going, though – hopefully soon. I’m going away to work at a camp in the summer, and maybe I’ll go after that. Or, maybe I’ll go to school for a year, get a better paying job, move out, save like a fiend and head out when the rental agreement is over. I don’t know.

All I can say is that the last couple months have been tough. So many things got really screwed up. But I think I’m almost ready to look at it, rub my hands, and dive back in.

And of course, I’ll keep this posted 😉

Next project – mega decorating my room!!

Inaction

Hmm. Well, this week has been interesting. I informally gave in my two weeks notice; I bought a ridiculously expensive pair of jeans I’m now getting cold feet about, and I spent a wonderful day with a good friend. All in all, it’s been an okay, week. I’d give it an even 50%. Definitely not great.

I know I want all of these changes in my life, but it is (of course) a slow process – which often gets me lost and confused. So I’ll jot them down here, and I can always come back to them when I feel as confused as I do now.

My goals for this year:

– Complete a Grade 12 course online, so that I can apply to Capilano next year.

– Be accepted into Capilano; prepared, with all the right courses to get me on track in good time, and the hard resources I’ll need to succeed.

– Read. Neil Gaiman, Tamora Pierce, Audrey Niffenegger, some classics. Books about criminology; philosophy; topics I want to invest my time in while at university. Perhaps I could do that in “second semester” (Feb – June): every two weeks, take a book out of the library, read it, study it, and think and write hard about it. If it’s a novel, examine writing devices, themes, symbolism, grammar, style, plot. If it’s an intellectual book, start building a foundation of knowledge. Find key points. Write about it. If possible, examine it in everyday life.

– Work hard at Starbucks. This is a fresh opportunity for me. I want to do a great job. I want to work a minimum of 30 hours a week, do well, and land a Shift Supervisor positions quickly. I don’t want to feel like I’m flip-flopping like I do on my shifts at Casa.

– I want to reap the rewards of that hard work as best as I can. That means a budget plan that I really do stick to, so that I earn what I can for university next year. I don’t know how much I will earn this year, and how much I will save, but I’ll be damned if 50%-60% of my paycheque doesn’t go into a savings acount, plus any tips I make.

– Practice being more independant. Rome wasn’t built in a day. Start with buying my own contact lenses; organising my finances so that I am in confident control; pay for my own phone bill and bus pass.

– Stop wasting my money needlessly! I am not going to purchase huge piles of clothes willy-nilly. My three main staples this fall/winter will be a jacket, these jeans and my boots. After that, I will not splurge on clothes.

– STOP WASTING MY MONEY NEEDLESSLY!!! No more food purchases. Bored of turning my bank balance into a disappearing act. If I am low on good snack food at home, I can put it on the shopping list. Capiche? No more food purchases. Lattes. Biscottis. Doubleshot cans. Cookies. Waffles. Fries. I don’t need it – most of that food is shit for me anyway.

This year off is focusing on me unwinding from high school, wiping the slate clean, having some fun, finding my interests and doing some self-exploration.

I took tomorrow off, and I should start getting things done. I’m going to:

– Find an affordable, no frills phone/phone plan.
– Organise my finances – a place for paycheque stubs, log book of savings, find a TD savings account to use, write a clear budget.
– Look at a gym pass and alternatives.
– Look around for a violin, new or second hand.
– Look around for a reduced-price pair of Doc Martens.
– Make a couple easy rules to stop needless spending. (Set weekly allowance, take said cash out, hide debit card?)

Time to take control!!

…………….

…. Not like my parents and Chloe started seriously discussing who to send me to in France for a few weeks to work on my French, right after I said that if I passed French 11 and got 94% in two Grade 12 courses this year I’d make a SFU Entrance Scholarship. Noooo. I mean, this year was going to be easy, right?

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Laa.

This week seems to be going on forever. But then it’s not really a week that’s over; it feels more like some unmeasurable increment of time is sliding by, so slowly – but, again, it’s just an unmeasurable increment of time, so there’s no celebration or relief when that bit of time is over. Just keeps goin’. Wow, that sounded depressing. It’s just I got put on three early shifts in a row – 5am, 645am, 645am starts – and I’m not used to it, so it absolutely blows. And then next week’s schedule is the absolute same. Monday – off, Tuesday – work, Wednesday – off, Thursday – work, Friday – work early, Saturday – work early, Sunday – work early.

Okay, so I know I am complaining about ‘the daily grind’ and how everybody else on the planet does it, so, Nina, suck it up like the good princess you are, but what the hell. It sucks. Why not complain? The weekend has been sucked away by a 5:50am alarm, and a 9pm bedtime. Not even to be replaced by a real weekend – two odd days off. I bet you I am working late the day inbetween. Just to make it juicier.

On top of that, I am having such a hard time figuring out university. Again, Nina, this is same shit, different pile. Whatever. I am trying to get an undergrad degree in – if not, at least dabble in – criminology, which is not taken on as program by most universities in Canada – not the University of Victoria, not the University of British Columbia; not even McGill carries criminology courses. Just the luck of a wannabe criminal prosecutor, right? I’m trying to gather a list of universities that offer criminology; what the profs look like, specific courses, etc, and factor things like city size, campus size, weather, costs, how close to home.

In a perfect world I wouldn’t feel the need for criminology in my undergrad. That would be nice. But you work best with what you know, right? Anyway, I’m chatting to a retired criminal prosecutor tomorrow, hopefully. That should really clear things up for me. I keep having to remind myself that I am going to meet with a person, not a concept, and the criminal law field won’t unanimously shun me if I don’t dress well.

Just one of those weeks.

Goals!

There’s no point spending a year just lazing around, hoping accomplishments will come my way. Time to set some goals!

By September 2011, I will have:

Passed my N test
Saved up at least $10,000 for university next year
Taken at least one extra grade 12 course
Successfully been accepted and registered for classes at either uVic or CapU for fall 2011.
Got into great shape, including trying out yoga classes!

I think that is everything for now… But of course, there will probably be more 😉

Oh, to Fight Crime…

I realised in the shower today that I will never be called to be a juror, ever. In the justice system, jurors are representatives of society that help the judge reach a good decision and to be a reflection of society’s current attitudes and morals. Prospective jurors are dismissed when it is discovered that they have had any kind of training in law. As soon as I step into my Criminology 101 course next year, I’ll be exempt from jury duty forever.

This isn’t such a big deal, but it’s kind of saddening to me – I was excited to be a part of the criminal system. However, I /am/ studying to be a Criminal Prosecutor, so it’s not as if I don’t get any cake.

The more I think about the process of becoming a Criminal Prosecutor, the more I understand what a process it will be. As Sam described it, it will suck, it will be harder than you can possibly imagine right now. And he’s right, of course. It’s such a hurdle. Seven years of studying. One year of articling. And I’m planning on doing this out of my own pocket? Seven years of studying. It’s mental.

I’m planning on speaking to one of my neighbours soon. It turns out that a woman who lives on my street was a prosecutor in one of Canada’s biggest cases a couple decades ago. Hopefully I will be able to chat with her about what it is like to be a prosecutor. It’s going to be an important conversation. I can read as much as I like about being a prosecutor, but it means nothing without actually sitting down and asking questions to a retired prosecutor. She’d be able to give me the solid answers I’m looking for; able to give me insight to what it means to have that profession. Things that are good about the job. Things that are bad. What to watch out for. What to consider. And, of course, I could maybe get some more information on the case she worked on. Which would be FASCINATING.

I might never get to be a juror, but if I’m right in thinking Criminal Prosecution is more me, I sure don’t mind.

Lemonade and Sunshine :)

Finally, Vancouver has burst into sunshine. Humid days with not a single cloud, and a slight breeze if you’re very lucky. The kind of days when you don’t plan on getting anything productive done between 11am and 9pm, unless productive means getting up long enough to make an icy drink or change the song that’s playing.

What makes this summer so satisfying to me would be being home – and knowing I’m here to stay. I could rant about this for hours – but that’s already been done. But now I’m home again, I don’t have so many worries. Right now it’s pretty much, I should go hang out with x and y and z, and when am I next working? While everyone else figures out their course loads as they enter university next semester, I’m just wondering the best ways of making cocktails with butter ripple schnapps.

I decided not to go with the Legal Admin plan. I felt like I’d just be wasting my time – I didn’t want to do that, with 8 years of schooling down the line. Might as well just take off this year to make a college fund for myself, get an extra grade 12 course,  and apply for Cap next summer.Which is all well and good – I’m actually really excited for that – but I am trying to figure out the purpose I can give to this year apart from just cold hard cash. While winding down from high school and getting prepped for university are good things to do this year, that really doesn’t feel like enough.

Who knows?

Oh, Fun…

After catching one of the last buses out of Lynn Valley and wishing for the millionth time that I knew how to drive, I dove into bed and got a precious 9 hours. Woke up, lazed around… Enjoyed a truly British breakfast of a fried egg on toast with orange pekoe tea 🙂 Lazed around, and then headed off to Casa Del Caffe to talk to Carley.

I haven’t walked down Lonsdale in months, and I realised that it is a very pleasant experience. So often I’m hankering for a bus and as I drive by I don’t consider what I’m looking at when I stare out the window. But walking down, strolling past every shop, I remembered some neat things to do and places to eat along there – Raven Pizza, Indian Fusion, and a little bakery that smells delicious and sits next to the new tattoo parlor; as for things to do, I thought I should swing by Rogers soon, pick up a movie or maybe Season 2 of Misfits, stock up on snacks and head over to Sam’s house for a chill evening in. And oh, the shopping – ! I strolled into North Shore Girl and remembered why I love that place. So many cute little sundresses, some beautiful maxi dresses that has me curious to try the trend; endless sandals and tank tops have me drooling. I could easily blow two paychecks in there in one day. Mmmmmmm…

Once I managed to pull myself away from my beloved store, I stopped by Casa. The place looks good from the outside – they’ve added big red sun umbrellas which look cute. Then I stepped inside – and, as usual, I always look at the floor before I look anywhere else. Sure, it needed a sweep – but once I saw how busy they must have been, I didn’t mind so much. Dishes were stacked high in the back and the bar looked severely “loved” aka bombed.

Okay, so I’m not painting a good picture here. But as a barista there, those signs look good for the barista – I walk in and know they just had a huge wave of customers come in. Customers = $$$. So I gloss over the fact they should’ve swept, etc.

Anyway. I walk in and Carley runs up to me and gives me a biiiig hug 😀 I chatted with her about the Starbucks/Casa choice, and decided Casa is the way to go for me. I love the people there, the attitudes towards coffee is great, the atmosphere is so homey to me and UGH, THE FOOD!!! I could eat the whole store. I am going to have to figure out a plan of action if I don’t want to become mordibly obese by the time September rolls around…

I played around on bar for a bit, got my milk back to scratch – win! – and my shots are doing alright, but I don’t really know what I’m doing with my latte art. Should be alright by the end of the week, I think. But once Jean caught wind that I was doing dishes when I wasn’t on shift, I was told to stick to bar and stop helping 😛 So I met a few of the new staff, who all seem lovely, and then decided to head out to the hospital for my whatever-it-was.

I was told yesterday that TM (jaw) joints aren’t x-rayed anymore – I can understand why, thats a shot of X-rays straight to the brain – and I’d have to go to the hospital if I wanted anything done. Well, that’s fair, I’ll go to the hospital tomorrow. Head down today, explain my situation, they say, well, you need a CT scan, but you’re a new patient, so you need an account. Upstairs (no idea) was closed, so I’d have to go to emergency. Okay. Head up, go to the wrong place, find the right place and am told to take a seat. Sure, no biggie. Take a seat, grab a newspaper, start flicking through. A while later… nada. Go up to the clerk again. Oh, we can help you now. Great. I’m starting to feel pretty wiped by now – doing a bit of work at the cafe left me feeling good but drained. I take the form, step outside and call mum to pick me up. I go back down to Radiology to ask for an appointment – I’m told I can have an appointment, or I could be waiting 30 minutes, proably more. Politely asked for an appointment and headed home.

I think it’s just because I had a late night last night and that never provides me with a good sleep, but I’m just totally wiped. There’s supposed tobe a party happening tonight but I really would like to just eat some delicious lasagna and maybe watch a movie before hitting the hay. Mmmmm, sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.